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I’m a gardener. A cook. A traveler. A spiritual guide. A paradigm-shifter. A conscious connector and conversationalist.
Like many of us, it’s difficult to say I’m anything else besides a mother, an entrepreneur, a leadership trainer. We tend to limit ourSelves to our job title or what our role is at home. Like many of us, it’s been a learning opportunity to say I’m anything else besides a mother, an entrepreneur, a leadership trainer.
For years, I was governed (and took comfort) in having a job description. A job title. A business card that stated my role and who I worked for.
There’s security in that. In having a written out instruction and policy manual, a clear printed out Roles and Responsibilities, along with who I worked for, worked with, and how to measure my performance.
In only a few years after leaving the corporate world, I was yearning for that same structure. It was long gone, in my marriage and role as mother and wife.
No one gave me accolades or bonuses on bringing up a profit margin or how many clients were served compared to last year’s same quarter.
And it continued to become more ambiguous as I navigated my way through a rocky marriage, parenting our daughters and finding my peer group of older moms to socialize with. My other friends from work were NOT stay-at-home moms. They didn’t understand my angst at not knowing how I was doing. Not having that consistent feedback from my VP or clients meant I had to start figuring out my own progress. Measure my own performance.
That wasn’t easy for me as I listened to the regular negative commentary from my then spouse.
It’s been a journey of self-discovery to undo that messaging in my mind, heart, body, and spirit.
Over 10 years later, I’m continuing to rewire and rewrite or completely self-author who I am. How I’m doing and how I’m feeling. I get to hear feedback from others and ask myself, “Is that true?” “Does it even apply to me or my experience?” Or “Is that their story showing up through my actions or their own reactions to me?”
It’s been a great decade. As I continue to unfold, blossom and show up, just like the new wildflowers, perennials, biannuals, and weeds in my garden, I see that there are a divine beauty and wild mystery to the timing of things.
Let’s see where this unfolds today as we dive into Self-Authoring. Learning about who we are as we are being reflected back by others, our gardens, the Universe.